


Try, try, try again

by DawdlingTime



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fake Character Death, Protective Bucky Barnes, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-18
Updated: 2017-03-18
Packaged: 2018-10-07 01:15:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10349148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DawdlingTime/pseuds/DawdlingTime
Summary: The first time around, it just felt like déjà vu.But soon enough, you realize it’s not some sick dream you keep on waking up from.Bucky dies. You die. Then you’re back where you started, only for it to happen again. No matter what you do, it always ends badly.Will everyone survive at some point? When does this tormenting cycle stop?Kind of an edge of tomorrow/before I fall concept. Probably a bit of a stretch, but it’s been fun writing it





	

You and Bucky went down to the common floor late for breakfast, just like any other day. Sam and Steve sat around the kitchen island, munching on their food while looking over something on a tablet.  
  
“Hey.” Steve looked up and flashed you two a bright smile.

“Morning.” Sam greeted you with a nod. He turned to look at Bucky and deadpan. “Hey Tin man.”

“Pigeon.” Bucky retorted back without missing a beat, accepting the milk carton Sam handed him.

Sam rolled his eyes. “About time you two lovebirds came out of your nest. We’re going down to the facility to check how things are going. Apparently there’s been some suspicious activity happening. Think you can hold down the fort?”

“Alright.” Bucky shrugs at the hypothetical question. The Tower had practically the best security in the world, and it couldn’t be safer. “When do you think you’ll be back?”

“Tony’s thinking probably by tomorrow night, if there’s actually anything to take care of.” Steve replied.

“Have fun.” You said, pouring out some cereal with a yawn. “We promise the Tower will still standing when you get back.”

* * *

Around the afternoon, you saw your teammates off. Your hair flew into your eyes as the Quinjet sped off. Your boyfriend laughed at your windswept hair, despite the fact that his long tresses weren’t any better off.  
  
He intertwined his fingers with yours as you two made your way to the rooftop elevator. You knew you were in for it as that heated smirk appeared.  
  
“So.” He murmured.  
  
“So.” You quirked a brow, already knowing where this was going.  
  
“We've got the Tower all to ourselves.” His voice was low with that rumbling timbre to it.   
  
“Seems like we do.” You smirked coyly back.

* * *

You startled and Bucky tensed underneath you when the television abruptly shut off. Then, all the lights went out, submerging you into darkness. You shot each other looks, silently getting up from your comfortable positions on the couch.   
  
You took the gun on the underside of the coffee table out, while Bucky slid his out from the couch.  
  
“FRIDAY?” You hissed. The backup generators should have kicked in by now.

“It appears that the backup generators are not functioning. I have contacted the others, but they are also under attack at the facility-”

The _Hulk proof_ glass windows shattered.  
  
Figures dropped in, the red symbol stark on their black uniforms. You and Bucky immediately shot at them, dodging when they fired back with...Chitauri weapons? The energy blasts were familiar as you ducked and leaped away from them. How the hell did they get or make so many of the alien weapons?  
  
“Fucking Hydra.” Bucky growled on the opposite side of the room from you. You connected gazes with him and nodded towards the elevator.  
  
Gradually, you two fended off the intruders while retreating to the elevator. Despite your combined efforts, the flow of Hydra goons seemed endless. A new goon dropped in, this time with a weapon less alien and more familiar, in fact it looked like a machine g-

“Get down!” Bucky shouted, sprinting towards you determinedly.  
  
He slammed into you, bullets deflecting off his metal arm with a _tink tink tink_ .  
  
You two went low, still firing back, trying to close that one last meter to the elevator. The doors were already open thanks to FRIDAY, and you just had to go a little further...

You took down an agent to your right using a Chitauri gun, your regular gun having run out of ammo long ago. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw blue energy glow on your left, way too close for you to move in time. The machine gun was trained on you too, _shit-_  
  
You grit your teeth, waiting for the fatal hit.  
  
A blast of blue.  
  
The rattling of gunfire.  
  
It never came.  
  
Bucky’s broad form slumped over you, frighteningly still. Motionless.  
  
“No, no, _please_ .” You retreated into the elevator, dragging Bucky with you. You frantically felt for his pulse. “We’re so close.”  
  
The metal doors slid shut. Your stomach dropped as you couldn’t find his pulse and Bucky’s chest remained unmoving.  
  
_It’s okay. It’s okay. The serum is going to heal him._ You thought to yourself, hands and body trembling. You had no idea how the alien energy blasts would affect him without any armor, and you ignored the multiple gunshot wounds-you just wanted to _believe_ .  
  
“Any second now. Come on.” _  
_

He stayed dead.  
  
You pressed your forehead to his, tears freely flowing. Your body was wracked with silent sobs.  
  
“The elevator is-” FRIDAY began, but became incoherent.  
  
You jolted as the elevator halted. A terrible screeching noise sounded near the doors. Your expression hardened, fury taking over.  
  
You took one last long look at the love of your life as you grasped the very kind of weapon that killed him. Gently, you propped him up against the wall on the side. With his eyes closed, you could easily fool yourself into thinking he was simply sleeping.  
  
The gap at the elevator doors widened further. You readied the gun, movements surprisingly steady.  
  
You might not make it, but you were damn well sure going to avenge him.  
  
Six agents go down before they surround you.

* * *

You shot up in bed with a cry.  
  
A familiar presence beside you immediately bolted up, knife in his hand, eyes darting about. “What is it?” He asked urgently, body already angled protectively between you and the door.  
  
Your mouth went dry at the sight of him. “B-Bucky? Didn’t you just die, y-you’re…” You choked tearfully, in sorrow and shock and confusion. There was a phantom pain where you had been shot. “Here.”

You reached up to gently touch his face, trace the slope of his sharp cheekbone and strong jaw. So carefully, like he might just disappear at any moment.

His beautiful slate blue eyes, wide awake once he heard your panic, regarded you softly. He understood night terrors all too well. “I’m here. It’s alright, doll.” He grasped your hand and lightly kissed it.

“No, no, you died right in front of me and I couldn’t do anything…”

Bucky shushed you soothingly and pulled you into a warm embrace. You melted into it, in disbelief but not ungrateful that he was breathing and alive in this moment.

He smoothed your hair out of your face.

“It was a nightmare. Here,” he took your hand and placed it on his heart, “feel that? Still beating.”

A small smile spread across your face. “Cheesy.”

“There we go.” He grinned. “There’s my girl’s beautiful smile.”

Overwhelmed with emotion again, you cupped his face and kissed him. His lips responded to your fervent ones just as passionately back, so familiar and so _real_. You had to pull away to wipe away your tears.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked, ready to listen. After all, you did the same for him.

“It felt so real. HYDRA attacked out of nowhere, and... I don’t know. Maybe they were really pissed that we’ve been picking off their bases lately. The others were attacked too. But they were away?” You exhaled shakily, the breath rattling in your throat. “Then someone was aiming at me but I didn’t see, so _you_ took the hit. Then you...died.”

“Doll…” Bucky’s jaw clenched. “I would do that, dream or not, in a heartbeat.”

That’s the opposite of reassuring. “Bucky, _no_.”

“I can’t promise to not save you.”

You shook your head. “I die anyway.” You buried your face further into his chest. “It’s okay. You’re right, it was just a dream.”

The unsettling feeling doesn’t leave even as you drift back into sleep.

* * *

The clarity of your nightmare did not fade when you awoke again. Neither did the horrible feeling in your gut. As you and Bucky entered the common kitchen, it got worse. Steve and Sam sat as they did in the dream.  
  
“Hey.” Steve looked up and flashed you two a bright smile. It was painfully identical and you offered a strained smile.

“Morning.” Sam greeted you with a nod. He deadpan at Bucky. “Hey Tin man.”

“Pigeon.” You silently mouthed the word along with Bucky.  
  
Sam rolled his eyes. “About time you two lovebirds came out of your nest. We’re going down to the facility to check how things are going. Apparently there’s been some suspicious activity happening. Think you can hold down the fort?”

Cold dread went down your spine. This was terrible déjà vu. But it could just be a coincidence, right?

“Alright.” Bucky shrugs. “When do you think you’ll be back?”

“Tony’s thinking probably by tomorrow night, if there is actually anything to take care of.”  
  
“Have fun.” You said, voice coming out odd. Bucky shot you a concerned glance. You shook your head.  
  
It had to be a coincidence.

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far suspending your disbelief, congrats. 
> 
> I don't know how this happened and I should be writing for Deterrence, but...here it is. Maybe I should've tagged this as crack. Hope you found enjoyment in it? First reader fic, feel free to lemme know any thoughts


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